Value Yourself, Value Your Time

I have a horrible habit of wasting time. And there is no better enabler to a lazyass like me than the internet. If there is work to be done, facebook, tumblr, twitter and email, here I come!!

However, this post is not about the internet and its usefulness versus its seductive time-suck qualities. This is about me. And you. And our time on this earth. We know it is limited, and actually frighteningly short. In contrast to other belief systems, Buddhists believe that our mindstream will continue into one life form to another after we exit from this life, provided that we are still stuck in the cycle of suffering and rebirth (Samsara). However, this cycle is not some kind of karmic joyride. Human beings who live well have some of the best chances of all sentient beings to end the cycle of suffering caused by ignorance, anger, and delusion (regardless of religion). Compared to the promise of an afterlife found in the Abrahamic religions, this too adds a sense of urgency, so that we see our lives as an opportunity that should not be trifled with.

Yet, regardless of this awareness, we still find countless ways to waste our own time. And it is frustrating, at least to me. Seconds tic by, then minutes, hours, years, and decades, eventually concluding yet another lifetime. Time is a one-way ticket, as each passing moment is gone forever.

In an effort to begin quelling my desire to waste time, I felt that I first had to understand why I do it. Is it boredom? Fatigue? Anxiety? Selfishness? On the surface, it could be any of those things. But when I thought about it, I realized that there was a direct correlation to my wasting time and feeling down in the dumps. Ironically, it is the self-centered feeling generated by my 'woe is me' attitude that contributes to my own self-neglect. This manifests itself in not taking as much care in what I wear, eat, how well I sleep, and yes, how I spend my time. If I am happy and content I am much less likely to spend my time tooling around the internet or mindlessly watching TV.

Why? If I am feeling depressed, I get caught up in a destructive and self-centered 'I am worthless' monologue, which sucks the life out of any goals or priorities that I would normally deem worthy and important. If I am not important, my goals are not important, then my time certainly does not seem so important. So I waste it, despite how much I am intellectually aware of how valuable it is. 

My conclusion: I believe mindfulness of emotions is the answer. Although I may realize the destructiveness of self-pity-induced languor, it, along with sadness and anger, still occur. I am a human being, and I know that still having so many ties to ignorance, anger, and delusion means that negative emotions will creep in. But instead of pushing them away, having these emotions offers an opportunity to observe them mindfully, to study and learn from them. This mindfulness has helped me realize that they are also impermanent.

So though time is a complex phenomenon, it ticks along as we breathe from one moment to the next. Just as we need to truly value ourselves in order to value others, we need to value our breath, or true being, in order to value our time. When we can value our breath, we can use our time wisely to live in the present moment to strive towards and achieve the the things we care about most.

"Life can be found only in the present moment. The past is gone, the future is not yet here, and if we do not go back to ourselves in the present moment, we cannot be in touch with life." Thich Nhat Hanh

May all beings be happy!!

The Farmers' Market: My Weekly Spiritual Retreat

Every weekend I go to a place where people are happy to be there. They are courteous, smile when they greet each other, and happily share with one another.

No, I am not talking about a weekly trip to a temple, dharma center, or dharma talk (although I well could be!). The joyous place I am referring to is my local farmer's market. Located in the center of Lafayette, the farmer's market I visit is the second largest in Indiana. With vendors selling local, in season fruits and vegetables, meat, fish, honey, crafts, breads and baked goods, and with music playing and people laughing, the atmosphere is carnival-like.

Yet still, it is almost holy. Ever since I started going, I noticed that although many patrons are full of boisterous energy, almost everyone is careful and mindful when choosing produce. They search reverently through the stacks of vegetables and cartons of berries, until they find that perfect bunch of basil or half pint of raspberries, and then proudly turn to the farmer to pay, an exchange which is often accompanied by a few moments of friendly banter.

As I walk through the street that has been cordoned off for the morning, I am amazed at how many people are smiling and so happy to be there. They are also willing to share with one another, which I personally experienced yesterday when I found the most beautiful basket of tart cherries I had ever seen. It was quite a large basket for one person, and it was $7. It was also the last basket. After I paid for my strawberries, I turned to a woman who I had seen also eying the cherries and asked if she would like to split it. She enthusiastically agreed, and after we asked the ladies at the booth, we paid, everyone thanked each other, and the lady and I parted ways with an even half basket of beautiful fresh cherries.

For the most part, I don't think that type of exchange would be possible at most conventional grocery stores. With their fluorescent lighting, piped in music, and aisles of processed foods, a typical grocery and farmer's market are worlds away. Not to say that grocery stores are bad, or that one can't have the same type of friendly and meaningful exchanges with the butcher, baker, or produce person. You may get to know them well and, in fact, cherish them greatly. Grocery stores are convenient and are a fixture in modern life, and let's face it, the reason for the aisles of processed foods is because we (as a society) demand it. But the major difference in atmosphere and overall feel cannot be denied. 

So getting back to my weekly market ritual, I just want to say how great it is to wake up, excited to go there, walk from my apartment, arrive and peruse the many vendor's booths for fresh, local produce. From the time I start out until I place the last item on my shelf or in the refrigerator, I am undeniably happy. And I think the same is true for most of the people who attend the market. This is why I strongly believe that in order to be happy, people need to somehow be close to the earth, and connected with their community. Recently I have lamented the fact that spiritual practice is sometimes difficult to reach, but who am I kidding? It is right here, right now, in the simple exchange at a produce stand. This is one of the few places one can immediately see the immense benefit that purchasing something fresh for oneself/family has on another person and their family. How's that for love, compassion, and true spiritual practice?

To find a local farmer's market near you, check out Local Harvest

May all beings be happy!

Write Speech

Anyone who is familiar with basic Buddhist concepts such as the Noble Eightfold Path (see below) knows that Right Speech is the first component of Moral Discipline. It is defined as follows:

"Right speech, explained in negative terms, means avoiding four types of harmful speech: lies (words spoken with the intent of misrepresenting the truth); divisive speech (spoken with the intent of creating rifts between people); harsh speech (spoken with the intent of hurting another person's feelings); and idle chatter (spoken with no purposeful intent at all)." Thanissaro Bhikkhu, 1999

And for anyone who knows me personally, they know that, except for the lying and slander, I would be the first to admit that I have failed miserably in Right Speech. On any given day, my words are often idle, irreverent, and yes, graphic. Some people might call it 'colorful'. I wouldn't completely say that I have a 'potty mouth', but the F-bomb is certainly a well-worn word in my vocabulary. 

I do want to change, I really do, but I have found that the shocked laughter that outrageous quips can generate is addictive! Saying shocking things is fun, with the added benefit that you also sound fun, maybe even cool and confident. 

However, the conflict I sometimes feel indicates that there might be something wrong with my verbal behavior. I am under the impression that I have enough maturity and experience to know that one doesn't need to cuss to be funny or creative. Plus, I knew things were getting bad when the people I work with appropriated a mason jar to 'pay' for 'inappropriate comments' (not just for me, but for all of us)! Loose change for loose mouths, I guess.

But since I do genuinely want to change, I have a strategy. Several times I have not only focused on being mindful of my speech, but pretended that I had to write down everything I said. The result? Well, I certainly spoke a lot less!! But more importantly, I only spoke when it was useful, helpful, and necessary.

Yeah, it seems too rigid, especially for a big talker like me. But I think it will be good practice for generating mindful speech, until I become more aware. As a wise man once said, if you can't control your mouth, how can you control your mind?

So for now, it's 'Write Speech' for Right Speech, at least while I'm at work.

What do you think? Would this work for you? Comments are welcome.

May all beings be happy!

Noble Eightfold Path

Wisdom

1. Right view
2. Right intention

Moral Discipline
3. Right speech
4. Right action
5. Right livelihood
Concentration
6. Right effort
7. Right mindfulness
8. Right concentration

The merit of doing 'nothing'

I recently purchased author and life coach Martha Beck's 2003 book, The Joy Diet. I have not yet finished it, but in my opinion the value of this book is apparent from the first page. Her overall analysis and advice begins by explaining that many of her clients have that dreaded but still uncomfortably common feeling, that something is missing from their lives.

What intrigued me is the very first challenge she puts forth. Do nothing- just for 15 minutes each day. Her account of people's reaction to this suggestion is descriptive, as she quips many "balk like irritated camels".

But, imaginative comparisons aside, the analysis and argument she discusses is convincing. 'Nothing' in this context is not bad, lazy, or negative, as our psyche obsessed with 'progress' and 'productivity' might subconsciously hiss.

Referring to the struggle people face in overcoming trauma and finding meaning in their lives, Beck writes:

"The best way to break through any barrier is to access a point of perfect stillness at the center of your being, a self deeper than your senses or your mind."  

That stillness, that place of peace, cannot be accessed as we flutter about, chasing after everything in our tumultuous lives and minds. Ambition is fine, and indeed admirable, but we have to make the time to just be still, so we can come back to ourselves and eventually grasp the 'whys' and the 'hows' of who we really are.

As I read the chapter it became clear that the essence of what Beck suggests is meditation. When stripped of the stereotypical accessories and preconceived notions, meditation is really about 'doing nothing'. Or perhaps more precisely, as a living, breathing, sentient being, one is non-doing. And that non-doing is the mindfulness bell that brings one back to the breath, core purpose, and eventually, one's core being.  

In the past, I have admittedly viewed meditation as just another thing I feel obligated to do, whether consciously or not. But with the wisdom of many funneled through the skilled writings of Martha Beck and others like her, I have come to realize that meditation is one less thing to 'do', and, more importantly something to drop all 'doing', and just experience. After all, everything we would ever need to know, want, and love is already present at our core being. To access that, we are blessed by the fact that all we have to do is sit down and shut up- if only for a few minutes each day.

What does non-doing or 'being still' mean to you? What experiences have you had just 'being still'? How could it benefit you and other beings? 

May all beings be happy!

The Time Has Come: True Practice

Often when I use quotations in my posts, I place them at the end. Today, I'll start with one:

"Studying Zen should not be confused with practicing Zen, like studying aesthetics should not be confused with being an artist." TP Kasulis

Funny, this was posted by DailyZen on twitter just as the idea regarding study versus practice was hovering about in my mind.  So, here's the deal, I 'discovered' Buddhism in the context of my own life about four years ago, in the spring of 2007. Since then I have read a lot of books, articles, blog posts, attended lectures, and gone on a short retreat. In all, this has been an intense period of study. 

And I wouldn't trade it for the world. I learned so much, most of which I was able to apply directly to my life in a positive way, which no one topic has ever enabled me to do. I devoured books from Thich Nhat Hanh, His Holiness the Dalai Lama, Thubten Chodron, Pema Chodron, Steven T. Asma, and Susan Piver. So many discussions, uncertainties, thoughts, and realizations- it has all been beneficial. 

But lately I have been experiencing something curious. I go to the bookstore and stand there, in front of the 'religion and spirituality' section, unable to choose any book. I am at a loss. I have not lost interest, I still enjoy the all the writings I have in the past. And being cheap is not the issue, because it is the same deal at the public library. 

Then I realized- now is no longer the time to read, the time to think. It is time to practice in earnest.

Of course practice has always been important to me, but as someone who was only recently introduced to Buddhism, my initial focus was learning some background (okay, a lot of background). I will continue to read books and texts, but I feel the time has come to deepen my practice, mostly through my everyday actions and routine. As with many things in our lives, we shift our focus when we are ready to move on to the next step. For me, the time is now.

May all beings be happy!

A True Skeptic?

A few days ago, my love and I were discussing the downright bizarre way some had reacted to the death of Sri Satya Sai Baba. For example, the fact that he had passed away on Easter Sunday made some people insist that a miracle must happen- like the mere suggestion was going to make him spring from the dead! First of all, while my fiance and I are both believers in small and great miracles, we also feel that one cannot * make * a miracle happen. Suggesting otherwise just seems insane, and also pretty damn self-centered.  

Anyway, from there our conversation drifted to the handful of controversies that had been linked to Sai Baba during his lifetime, mostly about skeptics insisting that the sacred ash and other items that he claimed to be materializing was merely a well-practiced sleight of hand. Okay, so as you might know, I am a pretty pragmatic person. I do not believe in hocus pocus, pulling stuff out of thin air, or even that anyone is watching over me every minute of my life (how boring that would be for them!). 

However, despite the allegations of Sai Baba engaging in trivial sorcery, there are many things about his life that are difficult to explain, such as being able to recite large passages from the Vedas after having little schooling, appearing to be the likeness/reincarnation of Sri Shridi Sai Baba, etc.

And then it dawned on me. Skeptics are often not really true skeptics. They prattle on about reality and pragmatism, but honestly, do they really know what that means? Aren't they just putting their own experience and 'knowledge' before others', ultimately ending up with the same type of myopic view? Maybe the people they should truly question are themselves.

Let me explain. We have all heard the stories- a small boy who experienced death for a short time but still lived, a person condemned to death by cancer returns to health through prayer, or an arhant in Thailand who sees people not as male or female, but as their true selves. All these are impossible, right? But yet, according to some people, they still happened and exist. And we all have the right to not believe them. Questioning is good. But the important thing to know is that we are not omnipresent. We may not share everyone's experience and just take their word for it, but still we can be open to it. 

So, question not just the phenomena outside your experience, the supernatural, the outrageous, the unimaginable, but the rational, the mundane, the status quo. Science and human reasoning are useful, but still incomplete. Challenging everything is just the beginning. 

*****

“Question with boldness even the existence of God; because, if there be one, he must more approve of the homage of reason than that of blindfolded fear” - Thomas Jefferson 

 

May all beings be happy!

Sai Baba's Death Mourned Around the World

Here are several links to articles with people around the world condoling and mourning the passing of Sri Satya Sai Baba.

His Holiness the Dalai Lama

Indian Leaders

Bollywood Stars

Trinidad and Tobago

Singapore