Anyone who is familiar with basic Buddhist concepts such as the Noble Eightfold Path (see below) knows that Right Speech is the first component of Moral Discipline. It is defined as follows:
"Right speech, explained in negative terms, means avoiding four types of harmful speech: lies (words spoken with the intent of misrepresenting the truth); divisive speech (spoken with the intent of creating rifts between people); harsh speech (spoken with the intent of hurting another person's feelings); and idle chatter (spoken with no purposeful intent at all)." Thanissaro Bhikkhu, 1999
And for anyone who knows me personally, they know that, except for the lying and slander, I would be the first to admit that I have failed miserably in Right Speech. On any given day, my words are often idle, irreverent, and yes, graphic. Some people might call it 'colorful'. I wouldn't completely say that I have a 'potty mouth', but the F-bomb is certainly a well-worn word in my vocabulary.
I do want to change, I really do, but I have found that the shocked laughter that outrageous quips can generate is addictive! Saying shocking things is fun, with the added benefit that you also sound fun, maybe even cool and confident.
However, the conflict I sometimes feel indicates that there might be something wrong with my verbal behavior. I am under the impression that I have enough maturity and experience to know that one doesn't need to cuss to be funny or creative. Plus, I knew things were getting bad when the people I work with appropriated a mason jar to 'pay' for 'inappropriate comments' (not just for me, but for all of us)! Loose change for loose mouths, I guess.
But since I do genuinely want to change, I have a strategy. Several times I have not only focused on being mindful of my speech, but pretended that I had to write down everything I said. The result? Well, I certainly spoke a lot less!! But more importantly, I only spoke when it was useful, helpful, and necessary.
Yeah, it seems too rigid, especially for a big talker like me. But I think it will be good practice for generating mindful speech, until I become more aware. As a wise man once said, if you can't control your mouth, how can you control your mind?
So for now, it's 'Write Speech' for Right Speech, at least while I'm at work.
So for now, it's 'Write Speech' for Right Speech, at least while I'm at work.
What do you think? Would this work for you? Comments are welcome.
May all beings be happy!
Noble Eightfold Path
Wisdom
1. Right view
2. Right intention
2. Right intention
Moral Discipline
3. Right speech
4. Right action
5. Right livelihood
Concentration
6. Right effort
7. Right mindfulness
8. Right concentration
3. Right speech
4. Right action
5. Right livelihood
Concentration
6. Right effort
7. Right mindfulness
8. Right concentration